


Sorry

by Shay_Nioum



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Fake/Pretend Relationship, Jealous Roman, Logceit - Freeform, Logeit, M/M, there's kissing, until it suddenly isn't anymore
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-09
Updated: 2018-08-13
Packaged: 2019-06-24 07:33:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 10,003
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15625848
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shay_Nioum/pseuds/Shay_Nioum
Summary: Deceit senses something is wrong in the mindscape and goes to check it out, what he finds it both heartbreaking and heart changing.





	1. Chapter 1

 

 

 

 

 

Something was amiss inside of the mindscape, and yet it seemed like there was nothing wrong at all.

Slinking along the ground his snake-like body moving slowly in and out of the shadows, Deceit’s bright golden eyes watched everything as his tongue flicked in and out of his mouth tasting the air.

The smell of chocolate chip cookies baking in the oven and a little hint of anxiousness could be smelled coming from the kitchen, so Patton and Virgil were residing inside of the kitchen. With Patton teaching Virgil the proper and the obviously best way in order to put nothing but one hundred percent of your love into baking cookies. He flicked his tail dismissively, there was nothing unusual about what they were doing. Patton constantly baked and cooked, so getting Virgil in on it was nothing new in his eyes.

His lanky scaled body started to slowly make its way up each individual step of the stairs, before his tongue flicked again the moment that his entire body had settled on the top step.

The scent of parchment, roses, and pomegranates led to the bathroom, where the door was ajar, and sliding his body forward. Deceit poked just the tip of his head in, ready to pull it out in a hurry just in case something unsavory was happening.

“Everything must be perfect! Perfect!” Roman sang, his deep baritone voice, making Deceit’s scales shiver, as he leaned over the sink getting in close to the mirror as he was applying his eyeliner. From what Deceit could see, he was making the wings on his top lids as sharp as the sword that he carried, and just a little bit too long in Deceit’s opinion. Although that was majorly up for Roman to decide, not that he was going to step in and give makeup tips to someone who would slice him in half for just occupying the same space as him.

Even so, though, all seemed well with Roman. So that left just one.

Logan’s room was at the end of the hall, and it took a while on Deceit’s part to just get there. The door was firmly shut, no matter how much he nudged his nose against it, the door wouldn’t budge. That alone was somewhat unusual, as Logan was well used to Roman and the others just barging in at random times, so instead of constantly shutting his door, he kept it open a crack. A crack that would have made it easy for him to slip in through to check on the nerd.

Deceit’s tongue flicked out in anger as well as in disappointment.

_Of course, he has to be difficult about things, he always does._ Deceit mentally grumbled to himself as he slid into the shadows, slinking along for a moment before he moved into the darkest corner of Logan’s room. Which, looking around now, wasn’t too dark given that every light seemed to have been turned off. With Logan’s desk lamp even being tipped over.

The worry that had clung to his small skinny snake body only tripled now.

His tongue flicked out in a hurry, the smell of old book pages, ink, and blueberries hung in the air, along with the faintest hints of salt. So Logan was still here, he hadn’t left or gone anywhere that wouldn’t be beneficial to his health.

His yellow eyes narrowed, scouring the room he moved forward, his yellow scaled belly moving over a few papers that had managed to find their way onto the floor. Looking at it now, Logan’s room looked...well awful if he was being blunt about it. Like some tornado had just casually gone on a stroll inside of the logical side’s department, and left everything looking like a crime scene of books and papers. The logical side was usually so meticulous in cleaning up after himself, so...how had this even happened?

Before that question could even get close to being answered, his eyes locked onto a leg, thankfully not a severed leg. But a leg poking out from behind the end of Logan’s bed, so moving forward, he eventually saw the body that it was connected to. Namely, Logan, looking just about as awful as his room, his tie hung loosely from around his neck not properly tightened to the base of his throat. He was wearing pajama bottoms, while his shirt was just the usual shirt that he wore anytime he was seen outside of his room. As his hand limply laid in his lap.

Most importantly though, cold tears dripped down his empty blank expression, as he stared at the stark whiteness of his ceiling. His breathing was uneven and choppy, even as he tried his best to keep his lips firmly pressed together so to not let out a single sound.

The issue, he had been right to assume that something was seriously wrong.

Without even thinking about it, he moved forward, his cold smooth scales rubbing against the logical side’s elbow as he made his way next to him before his body started to ripple and change. His form slowly growing bigger and bigger, until he sat there alongside Logan in silence, there was only a slight twitch from the other as soon as he had revealed himself.

He had known that Deceit was there the entire time, and still, he hadn’t made him leave.

“Not today Deceit,” Logan’s body shuddered with a deep sigh as he closed his eyes, letting a few more tears drip down his face without even bothering to wipe them away. “Today is not an adequate day to try and get under my skin to make me believe your falsehoods. Give me a few hours at least.”

God even his voice sounded awful, and Logan must’ve known it too given by how he grimaced faintly even as he kept his expression neutral.

“Not today Ssspeckless, even I am not the kind of villain to attack you at your lowesst.” He almost felt offended that Logan would even think that, but, in all honesty, he hadn’t given him much of a reason to think otherwise. “Perhapsss, and thiss iss a hypothesssiss, but can you tell me what isss wrong?” He asked, genuine concern coating his tone as he glanced over to the other.

Logan couldn’t help the sarcastic chuckle that bubbled out of him as he roughly dragged his hand over his eyes, opening them he balefully glared over at Deceit. Feelings that he certainly didn’t want to acknowledge were bubbling up, feeling that really shouldn’t even exist there and present within him no matter how much he tried to tell himself otherwise. Feelings, that in his opinion made him a freak, something that none of the others could even begin to comprehend.   

“You want to help?” He barked out a sharp laugh as he shook his head, “Why on earth do you care about my problems? What, do you care or something? Do you want to make me feel better?” He snapped, feeling himself lash out, Logan felt bad, up until the point he realized that feeling bad was a side effect of feeling at all. Something which he should have no idea about.

“I thought that it would help.” It was just a simple sentence, and the truth for once that spilled out of Deceit, and judging by Logan’s look of shock. Not something that he had been expecting from him.

That was the first crack that he saw in the other’s mask.

“I…” Logan swallowed before he dragged his hand over his eyes, wiping away the oncoming tears that welled in his eyes. His body shuddered again as he forced himself to keep it all under control, that was what his job was supposed to entail. Control of emotions with cold hard logic. “I like someone,” He finally confessed, the words coming out in a quick rush. “I like someone and I know already what they think about me. I know that they dislike me, I know that who I am, disgusts them, and I know..I know that he will never ever like me back. I know...that it is not possible to die of a broken heart in metaphorical standards, but..but it sure feels like it.”

It took a moment before the weight of Logan’s words settled on Deceit’s shoulders, then came the realization of his words. Logic, the one who wasn’t supposed to feel anything about himself, much less others, had fallen in love.

“Oh...oh dear.” Deceit whispered, a crushing sense of understanding landing on his heart. He was no stranger to broken hearts or falling in love for that matter. What hurt the most though, was just from the description he could already tell who it was. “Is it...is it the fanciful one?” He softly asked, and just the way that Logan’s body shuddered and the logical side curled in on himself, Deceit knew that he had hit the nail on the head.

To Logan it felt like his insides were getting put through a shredder, he loved to see Roman happy, he loved to see him smiling and singing like he hadn’t a care in the world. He also...wanted him to stay happy. However, as Roman himself had said, Love wasn’t about reason or logic. He of all people had no place loving someone like Roman, it wasn’t his place, and it wasn’t his purpose.

He was doomed from the start.

Chomping down on his bottom lip, Logan’s legs curled up to his chest and the only logical thing he could think to do was to hide away his face as he felt the oncoming onslaught of tears.

“Hey! Hey, hey, hey. No doing that,” Deceit softly scolded, pulling a little at one of Logan’s arms, preventing him from curling up and hiding away from his feelings, it just so happened that today of all days, he couldn’t handle the lies he saw inside of Logan.

“Listen to me Logan, and listen to me good. It is not your fault if he doesn’t like you, and it is not your fault if you’ve found that you love him. Broken hearts...I will not lie, just happen sometimes, they happen and they hurt like a bitch. You can pine over him all you want, I’ve done it before and I’m sure that I won’t be the last one to either. But!” Deceit held up a finger before Logan could interject, his expression as he could be at that very moment. “You can either stay in here and hide away, OR,” He said, getting just a little bit closer. “You can go out there with me, and show him that you aren’t afraid to love. Show him how much of a fool he is for thinking that love only belongs to one mindset.”

Searching Logan’s face, Deceit didn’t blink or look away, as the logical side blinked away the tears.

“So which is it?” He asked, as Logan looked down at himself, at his tie that was crooked and his mismatched pajama bottoms.

With a quick wave of his hand all that changed, he looked as dapper as ever with the only difference being that his dark blue tie, now had threads of gold running through it. A feeling of triumph and warmth raced through Deceit’s heart.

“I want to make him sorry.”

And with that Logan took Deceit’s hand marching out there, and absolutely treasuring the look of shock and a few other emotions that Logan didn’t know too much about as he kissed Deceit in front of them all.

He wasn’t going to be sorry for the emotions he felt.


	2. Chapter 2

It was the kiss more than anything that had caught Roman off guard, as he stood there with his mouth wide open catching flies as he stood stunned at the sight of Logan, sucking face with the snake of all people. His emotions more than anything felt like a jumbled ball of confusion that was tumbling down a snowy cliff, gathering more and more traction as well as more snow along with it. 

It took a moment for him to find his voice. 

“What,” He seethed hotly, “Are you doing?!” His voice echoed around the mindscape as he marched forward, ready to rip Logan away from the slimy snake and to slice Deceit a new one for confounding the logical side however he had. Something red-hot and full of rage seethed and burned inside of his chest as soon as he grasped the material of Logan’s shirt, ready to yank him back like a misbehaving child that was playing on live train tracks. 

Before he could do that, however, another hand swatted his away, and Deceit’s narrowed golden eye stared back at him as soon as he and Logan had separated. “Excuse you, but I would absolutely  _ hate  _ it, if you kept your hands off of my boyfriend Creativity.” Deceit smoothly lied, feeling a flush crawling up the back of his neck at the admission. 

The kiss hadn’t only caught Roman off guard but him as well, and he had been left clinging to the Logan side, who as it turned out, had more of a cunning side than he was willing to admit. Still, it seemed like Logan was indeed a fast learner, as he grasped Deceit’s hand again giving it a squeeze in front of Roman as the fanciful side’s face dropped in shock once again.

It took genuine effort from Logan to school his face, and to keep a calm cool composure instead of blushing a tomato red.

“Since when?!” Roman blurted out, that burning feeling was only growing now, now it was making his fingers itch. His hands missed the weight of his sword, and the need to separate the two that were holding hands was even more urgent now than ever. “As far as I know-”

Logan interrupted him right then and there, “As far as you know,” He coolly responded, taking it a step further as he moved his arm around Deceit’s shoulder, dragging him into the warmth of his body. “As far as you know Roman, reason has no bounds in romance. Which just goes to show what you know, I guess I just needed to find the right one. But since you seem to be so curious, we became a couple when…” Now Logan’s eyes darted down to Deceit, he absolute garbage at coming up with something on the spot, that was Roman’s job given his profession.

Now he was floundering.

Although he was soon saved from that as well. “We didn’t become a couple a week ago,” Deceit smoothly lied, now it was his turn for his arm to make its way around Logan. Tightly gripping his hip in what could only be seen as a possessive move more than anything as Deceit leered up at Roman, his golden snake eye flashing dangerously at the princely side. “He didn’t gift me an absolutely amazing book on magic tricks in the real world, and we had an awful session where he read to me. I later didn’t give him an astronomy book since he seemed to love it, it wasn’t obvious how much he liked it. After that, we didn’t spend more time together, and he didn’t ask first.” 

The grin on Deceit’s face was nothing more than the smile the Cheshire cat would give, to Logan he looked so damn proud of coming up with that lie and just how Roman seemed to hate every word coming out of Deceit’s mouth. Right then and there, Logan could have kissed Deceit for real, or laughed. Either one would have been amazing. 

“I was going to announce it when Patton called us for lunch, but you did interrupt our time together Roman. So if you would please…” Logan made a dismissive gesture, and Roman’s mouth dropped again, an indignant and offended noise leaving the prince.  

Without even looking Logan turned away from him, peppering Deceit’s face in kisses, only to pause as soon as his kiss got close to the deceitful side’s ear. 

“That was absolutely brilliant, did you see his face? You’re amazing!” He whispered, placing one last kiss on Deceit’s ear, almost missing the way that Deceit’s cheeks colored, the shade of rose going all the way up to the ear he had just kissed. 

In return, Deceit hooked his own arms around Logan, pressing the taller side more firmly against him, before he leaned up kissing his neck. “No problem, I  _ don’t  _ find that I rather enjoy this. You  _ aren’t  _ warm at all.” And just like that Logan’s cheeks were dusted over with a red that Deceit had only ever glimpsed in the most fondest memories of Thomas. He had never before seen such a more vibrant and lively color on someone else’s cheeks, and certainly not someone who’d made him blush just as much. 

Nevertheless, once the sound of Patton’s voice was heard by the both of them, they locked hands again, and they marched into the kitchen almost as if they were preparing for war. And war it was. 

Given that as soon as Patton laid eyes on them, the pan of freshly baked cookies, hit the ground with a loud clatter, spilling the treats everywhere as his mouth dropped open in a fashion similar to Roman’s as he stood there completely shocked to the core. As Logan and Deceit darted forward, picking up the cookies and depositing them into the trash. Forgetting for a moment the image they had together.

As it happened, he also forgot one other important thing too. “Ouch!” Logan hissed sharply as soon as his hand touched the burning hot pan, jerking it back he held it close to his chest as pained tears prickled his eyes. Patton, seemingly forgetting his shock, moved to step forward and take a look at Logan’s hand. At least until...

“Let me see.” Deceit demanded, moving in before Patton could even take his third step towards Logan, it took a moment, but eventually, Logan extended his after keeping it drawn to his chest for a moment longer. Deceit made a clicking sound with his tongue at the sight of the redness on Logan’s hand, and shaking his head he tugged the logical side up to his feet. “Keep it under the cold water, and I’ll be back with some aloe and bandages.” 

It felt almost comical in a way, to hear Deceit being the serious orderly one, when Logan had a lapse of judgment. Even so, he followed his orders, leaving his hand under the cold water as Deceit sank out.

“Logan...what is going on?” Patton worriedly whispered, his voice hushed as if Deceit was still able to hear them talking, from the entrance of the kitchen Virgil’s eyes peeped around. No doubt he had seen and heard everything, but there was no way he was going back now. Not when he had sworn to himself that he wouldn’t be sorry for his feelings, and not since he promised that he’d make Roman sorry for assuming that romance was out of his league. He wouldn’t be sorry, not even for lying.

“We’re dating now, as it turns out Deceit and I have quite a lot in common. He…” Logan paused, as he recalled the words that Deceit had practically hissed back at Roman so hatefully. “He likes to listen to me read and talk about the things I enjoy, and I..I just love him. I love his intelligence, I love how he’s managed to teach even me a few things, I love…” Here Logan paused, swallowing thickly before he went on. “I love that we’re together and that we respect each other. He has not lied to me, and I trust him. Just as he trusts me.” 

Patton had gone silent again.

“Are you sure? He hasn’t hurt you, silenced you, made you feel bad? Has he? Are you one hundred percent sure?” Stalking into the kitchen Virgil stood there with his hands shoved into his pockets, he wasn’t interrogating Logan, but instead clearing things up. Making sure that this was what he wanted. 

The memory of the kiss, the sly proud look on Deceit face, the moment of the both of them sitting together in the darkness of his room, and Deceit being completely open and honest with him. It all flashed in his mind in the span of a second. 

“I’m sure.” He murmured, ducking his head a little as he nodded, and just like that Virgil nodded and proceeded to back away as soon as Deceit rose back up. Giving Patton a nudge so they left the room. At the sight of the other side holding an entire armful of items that did seem like a little too much, to be honest. Still, the lying side piled them all onto the counter, and an affectionate grin curled onto Logan’s face. It seemed like Virgil wasn’t the only worry wart around here. 

“Dee, Dee I’m fine, you’re acting like I’m about to bleed out on the battlefield.” Logan tried to console him, not at all missing the look of concern that passed over Deceit’s face as soon as the lying side had applied the burn ointment, just for Logan to hiss and nearly pull his hand away. 

The grip that the other had on his wrist was gentle but tight, his thumb brushing over Logan’s pulse, feeling it increase at the pure softness of his touch. 

“Did you mean it?” Deceit suddenly asked, when it had become apparent that they were now alone again. 

“Mean wha-” 

“That you trusted me? That..we have some things in common and that you...respect me?” Deceit stumbled over his words for a moment, as both of his eyes remained locked onto Logan’s hand, as he gingerly wrapped it up in the softness of gauze before neatly tying it in a little bow. Deceit sealed the bow with a kiss, and it felt like his cheeks were on fire at the almost private sense of intimacy the action carried. 

“I was not lying if that is what you are talking about,” Logan began, slowly taking his hand back from Deceit’s grasp once the other let it go. “I respect who you are as a side, and I respect what you have helped me through. I respect the fact that you didn’t need to help me and you did, and I...do not decline the fact that we may have more in common than I previously allowed myself to imagine.” 

There was a long period of silence between them, as Deceit stared up at Logan with an unreadable expression. Up until…

“I would like to kiss you, Logan,” There was a moment of hesitation, “For real this time, but only if you want to.” 

Something familiar and yet totally foreign made Logan’s heart soar and leap up into his throat at the words, his heart was pounding in his chest as he shakily nodded his head. Reaching forward, he moved to cup Deceit’s face just as he had the last time. Only for Deceit to turn this on its head, grabbing him by the wrist and dragging him downward, their mouths slammed together, and a shiver of excitement rolled up Logan’s spine as Deceit’s other hand tightly grasped his tie. 

Keeping him there, not that Logan ever wanted to leave.


	3. Chapter 3

Logan was avoiding him, there was no way that Roman could so obviously prove it or even outright know that the logical side was avoiding him. But he just got the feeling, especially considering that Logan was never ever alone the moment that Roman came into the room. Ever since he’d started dating that snake of his, Logan never had a chance to be alone with Roman, and that tipped him off more than anything. Logan had plenty of chances to be alone with Patton or Virgil, but when it came to him...he and Deceit were practically joined at the hip. 

Roman didn’t want to admit it but it irked him, it really irked him to see the logical side so willing to be with someone who’d manipulated and even silenced Logan in the past. It was like a scurrying of ants had crawled under his skin, they didn’t look like they were there, but he could still feel it, and it felt awful. 

That morning, he got up before everyone else. Still dressed in the clothes he had worn just yesterday, he pressed the start button on the coffee pot. Letting the majestic smell of caramel hazelnut coffee flow through the air, grabbing two cups from the cupboard he set out his own. One that splattering of glitter on the side and a rainbow handle, and the other, one that had stars dotting the sides as a constellation made up the handle. 

Right on time, he heard the footsteps groggily making their way down the stairs, right on time.

The sight of Logan ruffled bed head, his sleepy bleary eyes, and tie adorning his pajamas made something inside of Roman warm, like someone had just released a bucket full of butterflies inside of his stomach. 

“Good morning, Lo.” He happily told the other, seeing how Logan stiffened at the sound of his voice, at that moment, the moment of what Logan had his guard down. Roman was able to see the panic crossing the logical side’s features, before he hastily smoothed them over in an effort to remain cordial in the morning. Definitely avoiding him then, there was no doubt about it now. “I made coffee, you want some?” He asked instead, fixing a pleasant smile to his face as he wiggled Logan’s coffee cup in front of him.

It was an offering, a peace offering no matter how you looked at it.

Logan’s teeth sank into his bottom lip as the smell of the coffee in the morning, and the sight of his cup was already full waiting for him. In all honesty, he hadn’t meant to avoid Roman, or perhaps he had meant to. Despite being with Deceit, matters of the heart were no easy feat to deal with, and as such avoiding rather than confronting was his best option when it had come to Roman. Especially given the fact that the creative side hadn’t seemed at all pleased with his newest relationship, even if that initially had been his plan, to begin with. 

“Ah coffee, yes…” Logan murmured, if it was an olive branch that Roman wished to extend to him, then it was an olive branch that he would gradually take. “Thank you, Roman.” He murmured, as he clasped the warm mug between his hands, taking a few slow and steady sips. The beaming smile he got in return made his insides turn, before he instantly glanced away. His attraction to the other would have no bounds here, he was over Roman, and he was going to stay over Roman. 

That was that.

Their silence stretched on for a while, the others of the mindscape still fast asleep this early in the morning. Given that Logan was almost always the person who woke up first, allowed himself to have a few hours alone in the kitchen. Now, however, now he was stuck here with Roman, for those hours. 

“Logan,” Roman began, his fingers drumming on the countertop, the creative side’s lips were pursed for a moment before his eyes trailed over to the side in question who was still sipping from his cup. Roman’s eyes trailed over his thin fingers that grasped the cup, before making their way to the other’s collarbone, that was decorated nicely with a few dark splotches. Rage simmered in Roman’s belly, of course, as a couple they had done other couple stuff. “Are you alright? Like truly alright?” He asked, looking for some kind of crack in Logan’s steely exterior that would give him a glimpse into what was going on inside of Logan’s mind. 

A shrug was all that he got for a moment, until Logan set his mug down on the counter. 

“I am emotionally stable, my health is alright, my mental health has been at a recent increase lately. I also believe that I have been getting enough sleep.” Here Logan’s cheeks pinkened a little bit, and that fury started to boil inside of Roman, especially as Logan added on with a little whisper.  “...aside from a few nights.” 

Roman’s hands shook as he held his mug, and it took a conscious effort to not march up those stairs and smash his favorite cup against Deceit’s skull. Instead, he smiled a smile that looked more like a shark baring its teeth, it was most definitely pained, even if Logan didn’t seem to get that. He held his breath for a moment, willing his ire and irritation with the dishonest side to go away, as he held his cup in one hand before reaching out with the other. 

Logan’s eyes snapped over to Roman’s hand as it came to settle on top of his, an emotion that he wasn’t too familiar with crawling and writhing around in his chest as Roman’s warm calloused hand squeezed his own. His heart rate increased, his palms immediately somehow became more cold, and his mouth was suddenly a lot more dry than it had been a few seconds ago. It only took a moment to tick off the mental checklist of his symptoms. 

Love? Negative. Love makes one's palms sweaty, not cold. Fear? Affirmative, the bodily reaction for fear included that of a dry mouth, cold hand, and an increased heart rate. He was afraid…

Why?

“Logan,” Roman’s fingers drifted over Logan’s knuckles, and the logical side felt the hairs on the back of his neck rise. Even so, it felt like one big impossible task to pull his hand away, like it had been super glued or cemented to the very spot he had it. “I..” Roman’s chewed on his bottom lip before exhaling. “I didn’t have the courage to say this before, and now I truly regret it but...I love you.”

Everything stopped for Logan, and his heart crashed against his ribcage. How was it possible for his heart to be going so fast? Why was it going so fast? How? 

Even so, he was acutely away of Roman’s gaze remaining locked on him, the warmth in his gaze being something that he had dreamed of before. But now...now it made him feel nauseous just being pinned under that stare. Why? He had wanted this, hadn’t he? He had wanted to be loved by Roman, and to freely love him back...hadn’t he? So what had changed? 

Even asking himself that question, Logan already knew. He knew what had changed, or rather...who had just changed him. 

“I apologize Roman…” Logan began as he slowly pulled his hand back and ran his fingers through his messy hair, messing it up even further. “But I do not and cannot return your feelings. As you know I am in a relationship already, even if I did love you, I would not cheat on him. I love Deceit.” 

And just like that, the bottled rage that Roman had constantly been holding in, exploded like a bottle rocket. As he slammed his empty mug down, nearly cracking it with the force that he did so. Logan stepped back, an unknown emotion flickering in his eyes.

“What do you know about love?!” Roman snapped angrily at Logan, “What does he or you know, about something you’ve never experienced before?!” His harsh voice hit Logan like a direct slap in the fact, and it left him breathless as his eyes started to sting. Be that as it may, and as much as it pained him to keep a completely straight face with Roman, as he desperately wanted to return the favor Logan stood tall and proud. 

“Apparently more than you.” He coldly replied, there was ice in his gaze even as it felt like his heart was caving in on itself, turning on his heel he sank out of sight. 

Out of sight and out of mind, where he could go back to his room, and release the pent-up emotions in the form of harsh ragged sobs that would be muffled into his pillows. Out of sight and out of mind. Nobody would be allowed to see him break down, just like last time. 

“Log-” Roman stopped as soon as Logan vanished from view, regret almost instantly clawing at his insides like a rabid animal hungry for meat. The words died on his tongue, although not because of his own reasoning, his hand with the force of someone backhanding him, slapped across his mouth not letting him get another letter of Logan’s name out. 

A dark hissing exhale escaped from Deceit's clenched teeth, as his fists trembled and shook from rage, never before had he thought that he’d feel so angry over someone else. Let alone, someone that he had cared about, it twisted and writhed in his chest like a pissed off snake that had just had its tail stepped on. He was angrier than he had ever been in his entire life. 

“Ssssilence Creativity!” He snapped, the clenched fist that had stolen Roman’s words shaking more and more with each given second, it felt hard for him to see clearly now as everything was blanketed in a lense of red. He’d heard everything, from the moment that he’d smelled the coffee downstairs he’d gotten up to be with Logan, he had stopped though when the two had started their talk. His insides had painfully wrung themselves out when he’d heard Roman’s confession to Logan, he’d thought for sure that this was it. Logan could now have Roman’s love, and they would have to end the magical couple of weeks they’d spent in each others presence. He’d have to go back to staying in the dark side of the mindscape, no longer spending his nights with Logan and listening to his smooth calming voice read him to sleep. That he would no longer be able to run his fingers through Logan’s messy hair, and feel the logical side lean into his touch, begging for more. It would have to stop, and honestly...he wouldn’t have blamed Logan.

However, the total opposite turned out to be true. A bubbling giddiness enveloped his chest at Logan’s stern words, a sense of hope, an emotion that he hadn’t felt in a really long time filling him up to the brim.

Then Roman had insulted Logan, that was when he was done with this.

“If you  **ever** ...and I do mean ever, insssult Logan like you did just a few seconds ago, I will ensssure that you will never ssspeak another word!” Deceit practically roared at Roman, his fangs bared for the princely side to see, as Roman’s eyes widened in horror. “And when the others ask about why I’ve silenced you, what could be so bad for me to never allow you to speak again… The only wordsss I will allow you to ssspeak, will be the truth. Then and only then. Ssso you better watch yourssself Creativity.” By the end of his words, Deceit was breathing heavily, his heart aching as he stared back at Roman before releasing his grasped hand. Finally allowing Roman’s hand to fall from his mouth. 

The dishonest side stared darkly back at him, his eyes shining with malice and rage as he stepped back turning away so that he could go up the stairs. 

“Oh,” He added, glancing back one final time, a disgusted sneer curled onto Deceit’s face. His yellow snake eye flashed for a second, glaring hatefully back at Roman. “Don’t ever lie to Logan about your feelings for him ever again. I won’t stand for it.” 

With that one last warning, he was gone traversing up the stairs to go and check on his starlight. 


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, this one is gonna be NSFW near the end, so if two characters fucking after a heartfelt moment isn't your thing. Then you might wanna sit this one out.

Climbing the stairs up to Logan’s room as fast as he possibly could without making a sound, Deceit paused before the door his hand reaching out for the knob before he stopped. “Logan?” He murmured softly, gently tapping on the door with his fingers before waiting for an answer, silence answered him back and the twisting worry in his chest only hurt a little bit more. “Starlight?” Again there was no answer, and dropping his hand down to his side Deceit let out a sigh.

Leaning against the door he pressed his ear against the painted wood, practically holding his breath as he listened for some kind of sound. His fangs sank into his bottom lip as soon as he heard it, the harsh labored breathing of someone trying to hold everything in and just failing miserably at it. The faint muffled whimpers only made him feel worse though. _If I had just stayed away then_ … Guilt tore into Deceit, as he softly thudded his head against the door, if he just hadn’t stuck his nose into Logan’s business then… _No, S_ tanding up a little straighter Deceit stubbornly shook his head at his own thoughts. If he hadn’t come along, then Logan still would have been sad and Roman wouldn’t have lied about his feelings for the logical side. 

He’d made Logan happy in the few weeks that they had been together. 

“Logan,” He tried again, as he furiously beat down the guilt that tried to rise up. “Whenever you want to talk, whenever..whenever you feel ready I’m here Starlight. I’m always going to be here, no matter what.” 

On the other side of the door, Logan practically clawed at his pillow as he shoved his face into it, his entire body was shivering and shaking as he attempted to confine everything. Every little emotion that Roman’s words had made him feel, every tear that wanted to escape, every sob that he could feel shuddering its way through his throat. Deceit’s voice was in the background of all of that when he finally lost it. The full torrent of his sobs finally exploded out of him.

Logan’s finger gripped the fabric of his pillowcase tight as he buried his face into it, even more, he gasped and shuddered at the raw emotion that stabbed through him. It all hurt so much, how on earth had Patton or any of the others for that matter dealt with this kind of thing before? How had they been able to deal with the full spectrum of heartbreaking emotions? It hurt, it hurt so much more than just simply pining over someone, god it hurt.

The agony of it rocked him to his core, and yet even as his arms wrapped around the pillow, and even as he tried to muffle every little sound that he made. He didn’t want to be alone.

So even with tears streaming down his cheeks and even though he could barely see a thing through the haze of tears. Logan looked over to the door, the door that was keeping Deceit out and away from him. Without giving it too much thought, Logan stumbled up from the bed tossing his pillow aside, before he practically wrenched the door open. He grasped Deceit tight, wrapping his arms around the other as he buried his face into his shoulder. The sensation of fingers running through his hair, and Logan’s name on Deceit’s lips was an even greater relief than anything he’d ever felt before.

“Hey, hey, hey. It’s alright.” Deceit murmured, his heart cracking open as soon as he laid eyes on Logan’s tearstained face, for a split second he wanted to go back downstairs and show Roman just how badly he had fucked up. However, as soon as Logan’s arms encircled him, he knew that he wasn’t going to take a single step away from the logical side. If any of the others wanted to get him away from his starlight, they’d have to knock him out and forcibly drag him away. 

“It’s alright,” He whispered again, pressing his lips to the top of Logan’s head gently swaying the both of them back and forth. “What do you need my Star? Whatever it is, I’ll give it to you. No matter what.” He swore, and feeling Logan’s arms tightening around him, a soft warmth filled his chest, the kind of warmth he had never even thought possible before he and Logan had started this entire thing. Truthfully, he had thought himself beyond romantics, but now...now not so much.

A shudder rolled through Logan’s body, and just like that Deceit was holding him more as he led the other back into his room. Kicking the door shut behind him as he kissed Logan’s head again, “Just..” Logan swallowed thickly as his fingers sank into the soft fabric of Deceit’s cloak, “Just hold me, don’t leave.” 

“Of course,” He answered back without a single hint of rejection in his voice, “Nothing will take me from you, I swear it.” 

And that was how they stayed, as the both of them settled back onto Logan’s bed, with the logical side keeping his face pressed solidly against Deceit’s chest, hearing the solid thumping of his heart, and feeling the fingers carding through his hair. They stayed that way for a long time, as the shaking trembles left Logan and as the knot of emotions that had laid heavily on his chest eventually faded away. He wouldn’t have had it any other way.

Eventually, though a sigh rattled Logan’s body, and he found himself glancing up at Deceit’s calming expression. The question was on the tip of his tongue, and it was something that he just couldn’t quite let go of. Something that they both needed to talk about. 

“Roman doesn’t love me...does he?” 

A set of differently colored eyes trailed down to look at Logan, just to find two soft brown eyes staring back at him. The look was drenched in sadness, but also a healthy amount of acceptance as well. But even then Deceit found himself pausing, it would have been easy to lie and say that Roman felt the same, that the creative side merely just didn’t know how serious they were. It would be easy to give Logan hope, hope that something could be gained by Roman loving him. That someday, when Logan forgot about him, he could find someone more worthy than Deceit. 

He couldn't.

He knew which lies to tell, he knew what would satisfy Logan and what words wouldn’t make him sad anymore. But...he just couldn’t do it. 

“He...does not.” Deceit relented after what felt like far too long of a hesitation on his part, it nearly crushed him to see the downtrodden crushed look on Logan’s face more so. “I will not lie, he does care for you. Very much so in fact, but his care is not romantic. He is...he’s scared of you being with someone who will ultimately end up hurting you. He cares, truly he does.” 

Seeing Logan glance back up, Deceit couldn’t exactly name the look in the logical side’s eyes, if he absolutely had to, he’d garner a guess that it was somewhere between acceptance and his own brand of stubbornness. Of course. His Logan was just about as stubborn as they came. 

Clenching his jaw tightly Logan sat up a little in Deceit’s arms, leaning on his chest a little so that he was looking right into Deceit’s eyes, while Deceit was looking into his. Their lips were just inches away, “I don’t love him anymore, when he confessed, I meant what I said when I told him that I loved you. I..don't want him anymore, I-”

The words stopped coming as soon as Deceit leaned upward, filling in the gap of those inches and connecting their lips in a slow sweet kiss, as his fingers curled into Logan’s hair. The logical side’s eyes slowly drifted shut as he lost himself in the kiss that felt more like a dream than anything else, he never wanted to leave, and he never wanted to pull away. 

So when Deceit did, Logan couldn’t help the faint whine that escaped him. 

“I know Starlight,” The dishonest side whispered, their lips brushing against one another with each word. “I trust you.” And just like that Deceit sealed the promise of those words with a kiss, as he entangled his own limbs with Logan’s as the kiss turned from simple and sweet to hot and heavy. 

It took almost no time at all to pin Logan down onto his bed, kissing and nipping the pale slope of his throat as the logical side whined and arched under his every touch. His fangs sank into Logan’s neck, and a needy moan answered him. 

“Dee..” Logan hotly breathed out, his lips slightly parted as his glazed eyes peering up at Deceit from behind his glasses, “Dee please.” 

A smirk curled onto Deceit’s face, his teeth gleaming as he loomed over Logan his hand smoothly running over Logan’s clothed chest. “Please what Starlight? I’m afraid that you’ll have to be a touch more specific with me, or else I might not know what you mean.” He teased, delighting in the way that Logan’s hips arched upwards, as if demanding the attention that it wasn’t getting. 

A whimpering whine left Logan’s lips, as a shudder crawled through his body. The hot fevered look in Deceit’s eyes as he stared down at him, made his body shiver and crave even more of the other’s touch in all the right ways.

“Please,” He breathed out, watching the other side’s eyes dilate with lust, “Please Dee, fuck me, mark me, love me.” He practically begged to the dishonest side, his gaze following Deceit’s every movement as he unclasped his cloak tossing it off to the side along with his hat and gloves.

Logan’s clothes soon followed suit. 

“Since you asked so nicely, I guess that I will.” Deceit practically purred in response, and with that their lips slammed together, their teeth clashing together fiercely as Deceit’s hand moved lower and lower, his fingers slicked before they pressed into Logan one at a time. 

The sight of Logan arching under him, moaning and screaming his name out with little regard for just who could hear him was a beautiful one, and one that he would treasure forever.  


	5. Chapter 5

“Are you sure about this?” Deceit worriedly asked for the fifth time as he paced anxiously in front of Logan, “You don’t have to talk to him you know, you could ignore him.” He offered with a hopeful smile, even though judging by the set look in Logan’s eyes and the stubborn form that was on his lips. Deceit knew that he had a snowball’s chance in hell when it came to changing the logical side’s mind.

Even so, Logan nodded his head in agreement, “You’re right,” He conceded, “I don’t have to talk to him, and I don’t even have to acknowledge him. But,” Here Logan held up his finger and Deceit went silent snapping his mouth shut as he allowed Logan to speak his mind. “There is no way that I’m going to let things stay like this until the end of our existence, it's better to get it out now rather than to wait. One of us has to be the better person, and I am certain it won’t be Roman.” 

A pout formed on Deceit’s bottom lip, and almost instantly Logan felt his expression soften somewhat at the dishonest side’s next words.

“You already are better…” Came the pitiful whisper, and almost immediately Deceit cursed himself for the whining nature of his words. Even if it did seem to make Logan somewhat happier with his constant questioning. The warmth that laid within those chocolate brown eyes made him internally melt, especially as Logan’s palm cupped his cheek. The logical side’s thumb brushing over his smooth scales in such a way that he couldn’t help but close his eyes at the pure pleasure of the gesture. The warmth that seeped into his skin was something that got him almost every time, he was wrapped around Logan’s finger, there was no way to deny that.

“I know,” Logan whispered, his lips curving upwards into the tiniest of smiles. “I know Monty, but it is still something that I have to do. You’ll be there with me anyway, and you’ll be able to let me know if and when he lies to me. Also, it's not like I am doing this task all alone.” 

That was, perhaps the only reason that Deceit had agreed to let Logan do this. The thought of leaving Logan alone in the same room as Roman made him bristle, but the fact that he would be there...well that changed everything. 

A deep sigh rattled his chest as he cupped the hand that held his cheek, placing kiss after kiss on Logan’s palm he eventually nodded. “Very well.” He murmured, placing one last kiss on the crease of Logan’s palm before he stepped back releasing the other’s hand. “I trust you.” And with that the transformation began, Logan watching every bit of it with rapt attention and the kind of eagerness that Deceit absolutely loved to see in his eyes. 

It was beautiful, the way that Logan’s eyes and expression lit up at something new and interesting. 

The effect though, was almost immediate as the world started to get bigger and bigger around him, Logan towered over him like a giant, so tall and imposing that Deceit had to tilt his head up just to get a good look at the logical side’s face. When it was done, however, he slithered forward, wrapping himself around Logan’s leg before he made his way up his tall beanpole of a boyfriend. Up until he reached the thin narrow shoulders of the other sides. Wrapping his long lanky self around Logan’s neck like a scaled scarf, covering up the evidence of their fun from a couple of days ago.

Logan grinned a little as he felt Deceit’s forked tongue brushing against his cheeks, his fingers curled under the yellow pythons chin giving it a good scratch. “Let me know however you can when he lies to me. Alright.” He asked, and instantly the end of Deceit’s tail tapped lightly against his chin, two taps, their own little code together. “Satisfactory.” He muttered, taking a moment before he sunk down out of his room, it was either now or never.

Rising up in front of Roman’s door, Logan had never felt more anxious about something he had prepared for. He and Deceit had gone over it countless times, he’d repeated it in his head, and even talked to his own reflection in order to get everything completely and utterly perfect, up until the moment Deceit dragged him back to bed. He’d spent days worrying over this, and now the mere act of raising his hand to knock on the door seemed so utterly impossible to him. This should have been easy, and yet it was the hardest thing to do. 

A tickling sensation brushed against his chin again, as Deceit’s tongue flickered out. 

That’s right, he wasn’t alone in this, he could very well do it. He had to, as he had told Deceit. He had to get things settled, whether he or Roman liked it or not. So clearing his throat, Logan nodded to both himself as well as the snake that was draped around his neck like a luxurious scarf. His knuckles connected with the rainbow-colored door, and there he stood waiting until he heard the footsteps drawing closer. 

Logan held his breath as it opened, and the sight of Roman’s tousled bed head greeted him. Tired bleary eyes blinked back at him, not recognizing the person in front of him for a moment, up until it finally seemed to connect for the princely side. 

Roman’s mouth dropped open for a second, but Logan beat him to punch. “Roman, I believe that we have much to talk about. May I come in?” Logan spoke through the weight that had settled on his chest, and the ball of emotions that had welled up in his throat. 

_ What do you know about love?! What do either of you know about love?! _

The memory of the harsh words that had been spouted out by the creative side made Logan internally shake his head a little bit, as Roman looked back at him with a most dazed expression before stepping back from the door opening it a little bit more in order for Logan to step inside. 

“Sure..sure..” Roman murmured, attempting to ignore the surprise that he was stricken with upon seeing Logan there standing in front of his door, at this time of day he had expected Patton or even Virgil to be visited him. Logan almost never came around to his room, let alone looking the way that he did. The yellow snake that was curled around Logan’s neck made him more than a little wary, given that he was sure that it had given him the stink eye the moment he had opened the door. “What with the noodle?” He casually asked, summoning a chair for Logan as he dragged his own chair out from behind his desk.

“This is merely Deceit’s pet snake..Deenah.” Logan lied off the top of his head, blurting out the first name that had come to mind, Deceit’s tongue flicked against his cheek and Logan had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from smiling. Especially as he sat down, eyeing Roman cautiously as he crossed one leg over the other. “Speaking of snakes, however…” 

Within seconds the tiny hopeful smile that had appeared on Roman’s face was brutally stamped down as ever semblance of warmth fled Logan’s eyes. This was the logical side being serious, there would be no witty banter or nerdiness from him today. Roman could see that well enough. 

“Before you start…” Roman hesitantly interrupted, as he folded his hands into his lap his head hanging shamefully as his hair flopped in front of his eyes. “I would like to apologize to you for what I said. You didn’t deserve that, and it was cruel of me to stay the things that I did. I…” Roman’s shoulders hunched a little more, as the creative side dropped his head a little with each word, almost as if he was attempting to bow without looking too ridiculous. “I’m sorry.” 

Silence answered Roman’s words as Logan’s eyes trailed down to the bright yellow head of the snake wrapped around his neck, the logical side waited for a moment as the snake’s eyes narrowed before resting its head back onto Logan’s shoulder. 

Logan’s eyes softened a little, and Roman felt the tension in his shoulders loosen up a little bit. “I forgive you for your brash wording.” The words themselves were spoken as cooly as possible by the other side, but Roman didn’t care, the only thing that concerned him at that moment was that he had in fact been forgiven, that Logan didn’t, in fact, hate him and that perhaps...he wouldn’t screw up again with his chance. Logan didn’t give chances that often, but somehow, in some way, he had earned it. 

“However,” And just like that Roman felt his hope beginning to drain away as Logan lifted a single finger up, demanding his silence. “I do not appreciate being lied to Roman, especially when the lie pertains to my feelings that you attempted to play with.”  

The sharp jaded look was back in Logan’s eyes, and Roman felt himself wilting under the icy cold stare that ripped right through him. Roman’s tongue felt like lead in his mouth, and a great pit of dread opened up inside of him. He almost wished that a great pit would open up under him and swallow him whole, of course, Deceit would have told him, he wasn’t sure why he was so surprised by that fact. The dishonest side had most certainly seemed outraged after Logan had fled the room, although that was a given with the threat that Deceit had hissed at him, holding his very voice hostage. 

“I just..His entire thing is lying Logan! I don’t trust him!” Roman blurted out, needing to make his points heard, he itched to stand up to detail his points further, but he remained sitting balling his hands up into fists. “Whether you like it or not, romance is not your thing, I..I don’t want you getting hurt by someone who could easily toy with and break your heart! We’re all family, and isn’t familiar supposed to protect one another?! I..I..” Roman let out a ragged sigh as he ran his fingers through his messy hair, “I don’t know what I would do if you got hurt, Lo. I don’t tell it to you often enough but..but you matter. Your thoughts and feelings towards someone matters, and..and I don’t want Deceit of all people to abuse that.” 

Logan’s breath caught in his throat, and for a moment he completely forgot to look down at the snake wrapped around his neck, he didn’t feel a squeeze and the emotion making his breathing halt also made him tear up for a moment. It took a moment for Logan to swallow the swelling emotions down, closing his eyes for a second Logan inhaled and exhaled deeply before he got up to his feet. He took it slow, one step at a time until he stood in front of Roman. 

“You do not have to trust him, trust me.” He whispered, “Deceit is not just lies although that makes up a large portion of who he is. He is self-preservation, he is self-defense, and…” Logan felt the tip of Deceit’s tongue tickling his cheek again, only this time he knew that there was a purpose. Deceit was touched by his words, more so than he had ever been before. “He is the person that I love, and the one who has helped me come to terms with a lot of my own emotions. He has not lied to me, and he has sworn not to do so.” 

Logan paused once again, scratching his fingers under Deceit’s chin, as Roman watched him with an equally concerned and unsure gaze. “You are right in saying that I don’t know emotions and romance like you do, but Roman...I know enough to understand how I should be treated in a relationship, I am not a fool. So please, just trust me with this?” 

Looking up at Logan, Roman still couldn’t help but to have his doubts, if it turned out that Logan had gotten hurt when it came to Deceit, he knew that he’d blame himself above all else. He didn’t want him to get hurt, he wanted Logan’s first love to be someone who would treasure him and shower him in the proper love that he deserved. He could have cared less if it was with Patton or Virgil, it being Deceit… He didn’t understand it, but then again perhaps he wasn’t meant to.

“Fine,” Roman sighed, “Alright.” Standing up Roman opened his arms with a hopeful look on his face, the feeling of Logan returning that hug and gripping his pajamas tight made him instinctively hold onto the logical side a little bit tighter. Fear, uncertainty, and worry all rolled around inside of him. Was this what it was like to be a parent? If so, then it felt absolutely awful. “I’ll trust you on this, but please…please be safe,” Roman begged, squeezing his eyes shut tight as he felt a stinging sensation prickle his eyes. 

The hand grasping the back of his shirt tightened. 

“I will.”


End file.
